Changing of the SEASONS

I have been in a hard struggle with myself the last few months. Been slowly going into this pit of loneliness and darkness and I havent totally been alert enough to understand why. Things have certainly been crazy in my life. We have had a lot of sickness with me, the kids, Sam, my grandmother. The death of Sam's uncle, trying to sale my grandmothers house and convincing her to sale. Work brings me down alot lately. The atmosphere at work is one of unease, negative and aggravation.

I have been praying, more talking to the God about my hurt and the pain that I feel. I feel that he is pulling me in a different direction. My heart is no longer where it needs to be. I believe that the Lord is in the process of changing the seasons of MY LIFE.

As it says in Daniel 2:21 "He changes the times and seasons" My season is coming to change. Not meaning the change of life, but a change in my life.

My heart has been heavy burdened and I have been struggling to figure out what is wrong with me. Im not satisfied in my current status or role that I live. Not happy with the mom I am, the wife I try to be, the child of God that I should be. Instead of letting go and following a way that if obvious, I have been worrying my self into a dark hole.

My husband doesnt wear his wedding ring, not because he doesnt claim me, but bc of his work it has before gotten his finger caught and bc of that he chooses not to wear it as a safety precaution. This morning I was drawn to his ring in my jewelry box. I looked at it and was pulled to take it and I have worn it all this day. Probably sounds corny but I did what I was led. Then this morning coming into town, we did our morning prayers and then we listen to AFR. This morning they were talking about marriage - how ironic. I have been called to pray over this ring today. Asking the Lord to bless this man, this husband, this father. Praying for a marriage of strength, a home of love and a marriage that will honor God and that I may be a wife that will hold my husbands heart to the Lord.

the show talked about the importance a wife has in a marriage. She is the mother, nurturer, the care taker, the emotion the love the kindness the doer and the giver, very seldom the taker. This opened my eyes as to the ring. I felt the urge to wear the ring this morning but now I understood more why.

I want to be home, I want to be more with my children, I want to be better at home for my husband, I want to care for my home the way God would have me do. I have been praying for a way home and I know that HE hears my cries.

I see the moving of this time, I see the change of this season in my life, before me I see God preparing a way for me to be a better mom, a better wife and better child to HIM.

Preparing a way for change, light upon my path and a new season is coming into my life. So excited to see the doors He is preparing to open for me.

Just babble, but it is of my heart. Just wanted to share the power of our Lord

Fall and FALLS

Fall is certainly in the air. LOVE this weather, love the smells that come with this time of year, love the colors that God paints the morning and evening skies, love the shades of color of orange and red that he lays on the leaves in the trees and on the ground. Only our Lord can paint with the colors of Fall.

This time last year I was pretty pregnant, almost miserable and getting very excited about the upcoming arrival of our sweet Sophie.

This time this year I am still trying to lose the "Sophie" weight and I still very excited about the arrival of our sweet Sophie and all the milestones that have happened.

Sophie turned 9 months old last week. Doesnt seem like it has been that long. It has been an emotional roller coaster lately. The ups are higher than high and a few lows that have wanted to hang around, but by HIS grace we have over come.

Some of our highs are that SOPHIE IS WALKING. Doesnt seem real. She still seems to small to walk, but over the coarse of a week she went from holding on to furniture and walking, to letting go and taking a few steps to someone holding their hands out, to pulling up and letting go and taking off.

Proverbs 3:23 Then you will go safely on your way; your foot will not stumble

I know that this is a new journey for Sophie, she will have many steps in her life and many falls to come. My prayer for her and Gracie and Jake is that when they FALL and stumble and feel on the bottom, that they will turn to HIM and know that HE upholds all those who fall (Psalm 145:14) and they will find HIS strength in their weakness.